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…of Ramadhan & PhD…

Assalamualaikum wbh…

My last post was in November last year…

Not sure either too lazy to update or terlalu busy…make it both lah…

Alhamdulilah Allah bagi peluang untuk jumpa Ramadhan kali ni…dengan doa semoga Allah beri peluang untuk habiskan sampai ke hujung malam LailatulQadar. 

I have received a few emails from readers asking how’s my study going so far. Alhamdulilah masih meneruskan lagi…sekarang dalam stage submit chapters stage by stage pastu received feedback….btolkan…hantar balik and the routine goes sampai both of us (me and supervisor) satisfied it can be a good chapter. To be honest the progress is quite slow currently…the motivation jatuh menjunam tak tahu nak build up balik mcm mana…hu..hu…selalu doa Allah bagi semangat and rasa motivated mcm awal2 enroll phd dulu….semngat mcm masa lepas defence thesis proposal…nak semua semangat tu balik…

I am the type of individu yg susah nak share the problem in my study with others…kalau org tanya…asyik jawab doakan yer…org lain pun tgk I am happy menjalani hidup kat UK ni…but you can’t hide it in marriage…my hubby understands me even I have not share with him any single of my difficulties in my study. My hubby sendiri has his own problem in study…kan bila farah citer tambah headache kat kepala dia but he observes me everyday…and one day he says that I need to change the place of my workstation. I am not longer focus when I am at home…ada jer house chores yg nak buat and kalau x de pun…duk layan Uwais…sampai tak fokus kat study…so we discussed and he suggest me to go and study elsewhere and we divided the schedule in order for both of us to stay focus in our study. 

For your information, I have moved to Edinburgh since last February…so when he suggests me to study elsewhere, duk pk…takkan nak berulang hari2 naik train pergi Dundee semata2 nak g office and study…will cost a lot of money, wasting time and energy. Then, baru teringat masa mula2 my hubby enroll his study in Edinburgh Uni, I have applied for a SCONUL Access from the Edinburgh Uni Library untuk dapat access masuk. So settle, I have decided to study in the library 🙂 On the schedule, both of us akan gilir2 by week, for me to go to the library and hubby to go to his office and Uwais still under the care of either of us 🙂 

Then I said to my hubby, how about house chores? He said he will do the laundry while he at home and make sure Uwais cukup makan…he…he…for cooking…he suggest me to cook a lot at a time then frozen kan….so senang bila nak berbuka…panaskan jer lauk yg ada….brilliant idea 🙂

So Alhamdulilah finally i am trying back to be on track…please doa for us…setiap kali org tanya study mcm mana to both of us takde yg lain we ask for accept doa….doa senjata org mukmin kan 🙂 

Ramadhan Mubarak from us in Edinburgh, Scotland ♥

p/s…puasa thn ni 19-20 jam 🙂 

p/s..balik ni mesti hubby tegur…pergi library study bukan update blog…he..he..

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…of last day…

Assalamualaikum ♥

It’s not my last day…its my last day virtually face to face with my supervisor. This happened for the second time through my PhD journey,  during my first year of study, my supervisor left for an offer of professorship and I have been replaced with a very knowledgeable, helpful and dedicated personal. But now he is leaving too for a better offer in other country….speechless, sad, demotivated..name it…all those negatives aura surrounding myself when I heard the news. But, alhamdulilah…he is still willing to supervise me consistently and actively as before but the difference through long distance supervision. Appreciate every inches of his willingness to still supervise and support me through write-up process. I could not imagine to start a new phase again and adapt with new character and supervision as I have no time for this additional environment during my final year of study 😥

I might repeat the same phrase and sentences, trust me, PhD journey full of challenges, either through supervision, environment or any other aspects of life. Some be test with supervisor problem such as being left doing your research alone without any supports and supervision, some being test with sickness, some with family problem,,,I do really admire couples, both husband and wife pursuing PhD in same time and have either 2, 3 or more kids but still graduate with flying colors. There are some which I know and they managed to complete their PhD successfully. Me, being only with one little caliph, still find the challenges are too extreme for me, as husband has started his lab works, 2/3 time in a week travelling to Edinburgh…feel very…very tired. But I know if others can, why don’t me. Just reflect back and stop complaining…you have a lot of supports and the most important thing, du’a is the weapon of life. The promise of Allah, verily every hardship come ease…

20141104_164022[1]♥ Farah ♥


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…of entering final phase…

Assalamualaikum ♥

Dear blog, it has been a while since my last entry. Last month was the most meaningful moment for my little family as we got the chance to have a month of holiday in our lovely homeland, Malaysia. Alhamdulilah dimurahkan rezeki untuk beli tiket balik and spend our time with families and the most memorable moment was when Uwais had the chance to meet both of his grandparents. 

Now back to Dundee, entering the final year of my PhD study…takut, gelabah, semua perasaan pun ada…indescribable feelings…its true, sblm ni senior2 which have finished their doctoral study always remind me, bila masuk final year kita dah mcm org bercinta…mandi x basah, mkn x kenyang, tidur x lena…tapi me myself setakat ni ok lagi lah…mkn n mandi perfect jer…he..he tapi bab tido tu yes…lena kejap then akan terjaga balik pk bnyk lagi x siap…hu..hu…plus my husband himself dah enter 2nd year which in the state of stimulating data and everything…plus Uwais yg makin aktif and alhamdulilah we as parents are proud with his development and achievements…make me appreciate every second of the time. And yes currently me and my husband are thinking of sending Uwais to childminder (Childcare) for us to concentrate on our study. We are trying our very best to take care of him by ourselves but with current stage of him being extra active…we really need to consider the options..plus sending him there will help a lot of his social skills with others toddler and teachers.

But after all, I keep reminding myself…we as Muslim have extra package as we have Allah to hear either our good or sad story…to ask his Mercy in helping us to get through of all those challenges and to praise Him for all the happiness and bless that He always gives…as said by Ustaz Ahmad Dusuki in his facebook


Kita ada Allah, tempat mengadu dan mengharap, bercerita setiap musibah dan nikmat, dalam dingin malam menjelang siang, bangunlah seketika, bersimpuh setia, sujud kepadaNya, lalu sebut dan ulanglah dalam tadahan doa, Dia sentiasa mendengar rintihan hamba, tidak disini? di Sana nanti, akan dikabulkan jua.. sabarlah dalam meminta.. usahlah berputus asa.. meminta dan meminta, kerna Dia (Allah) terlalu gembira dengan hambaNya yang merasa.. ia hambaNya..

Moga Allah permudahkan perjalanan menuntut ilmu me & my husband…ameen

 

 

 

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…of GOT visit…

Assalamualaikum ♥

Alhamdulilah…starting from 22-24 June 2014, semua staff & Academic Trainee IIUM yang on study leave PhD in UK dikumpulkan di Oxford bagi program bersama top management IIUM yg dtg ke UK for a visit and show their concern on our study progress. Program 3hari 2 malam di isi dengan pelbagai slot amanat dari executive directors IIUM & sesi interview for each and every one of us with them. This time, it was an honour since our honourable rector was there to share her amanat with us on the 2nd night. Me personally rasa terharu sbb rasa mcm mak datang visit anak, thank you so much IIUM top management for your time and concern towards us…please pray for our successful in completing our study on time. Nothing much to write this time, enjoy some of the memories created during the event ♥

At & Staff Brothers

IIUM staff & Academic Trainee with Honourable Rector & top management (Brothers)

AT & Staff SistersIIUM staff & Academic Trainee with Honourable Rector & top management (Sisters)

2014-06-23 09.00.56Doa ummi & ayah semoga ada peluang untuk uwais sambung belaja kat Oxford yer 🙂

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 Study Plan & Gunn Chart presented during the progress study interview
Approaching 3rd year of PhD study soon…cepatnya masa berlalu..kena lebih pulun lagi….

♥Farah♥

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…of conferences…

Assalamualaikum ♥

May and June, both months have been a very tough moments for me…dates were full with writing papers, presenting them in conferences, conferences journey, run here and there and I can’t remember a single moment that I can take a deep breath just to have a time for relax. But after all, those hardships are paid off with the smooth presenting the papers and get feedback from the audience. The main aim for me just to share my research and get feedback to improve it and gain more suggestion and not to forget critics. Since my 1st day enrollment in this PhD journey, I have trained myself to be an open-minded person in receiving suggestion and critics. Alhamdulilah I have the control of it since then. The only thing that I am quite regret is to put my little family always on the move, travel with me here and there, thank u for always there for me, giving endless support..love both of u so much!

Ok, my 1st conference was in London organized by Occidental Institute for Islamic Banking and Finance (OIIBF). A one day conference held last April was my 1st conference attended since I have started my PhD study. I would say that this conference is more like a round table discussion and if my friends interested, this conference focusing more on the Islamic Banking and Finance studies rather than the legal part of it. After all it is a good start for me although there is not much feedback that I may gain from this event as my thesis is focusing more on the legal aspect of Islamic Finance. I have just checked their website and they have already open for 2015 conference. The abstract must be submitted for a review by end of November…so don’t be late if you are interested 🙂 IMG_20140429_170755[1] In brief on the procedure to present a paper or poster in a conference. Once you have found a suitable conference that relates with your study and you have decided to present a paper, you might need to send an abstract before submitting a full paper. Your abstract will then be reviewed and if the panels satisfied, they will inform you that your abstract have been accepted and due to submit a full paper. Some organizer will only decide that your paper have been accepted once you have submitted the full paper which the acceptance of abstract does not guarantee you may present your paper. On the other hand the acceptance of the abstract itself has guarantee a place for you to present your paper. Hope it helps and disclaimer, different area of study may have different procedure so don’t totally rely on my suggestion..please do your reading as well!!! Not to forget on the funding part…attending conferences might be costly especially in term of fees. As for me, my school is willing to pay for it as long I am participating the conference either presenting paper or poster and not as an audience per se. 

The 2nd conference,Queen Mary Postgraduate Legal Research Conference 2014 that I have attended last week was also in London. For this time conference, I would like to have an experience presenting a poster since I have try presenting a paper in the 1st conference. Presenting a poster might seem a bit easy but for me it was a quite challenging experience for me. The first part is on the preparation of the poster itself. I am a first time user of Microsoft Publisher and it took me almost two sleepless nights just to finish illustrating the poster and print them out in A0 size. Then, when the poster has been put up in the poster gallery, the skills of convince and attract the visitors to look at your poster and allowed them to fire those killer questions is another tough part of it. But after all, alhamdulilah…it went well i guess…hu..hu

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Then back in Dundee, I am due to present in PhD seminar for my second chapter. To be honest, I am not really prepare for this presentation. The stress and tired of a long journey from London still have not been recovered but I have to proceed with it. Every time in the state of extremely tired handling the study, house chores, my little caliph and the community, I just remind myself that your life on this earth is to work for both dunia and akhirat and the life in the hereafter is the time for you to have a proper rest. So just continue to work Farah! Back to the seminar, alhamdulilah….its true, when you have tried your very best and work very hard on certain things, Allah will give the same or more of His mercy and ease your journey. The presentation went very well….I have the confidence level of extremely high out of nowhere (maybe because of too tired, the nervous system does not work for me…hu..hu). I managed to address all questions and satisfied the audience with the answers and the happy and memorable part for me is when one of the Professor in the centre personally meet me after the presentation to congratulate me and express his interest and really looking forward to read my thesis once I done with it. He said, he loves the way I am organizing my work, address every issue in appropriate way and working very hard for it. Insyallah…I am trying my best, I know this journey is not easy…but once I have involve with it, I need to finish it..pray for me my deary friends :’)

Love,
Farah

 

 

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…of hard & tears…

Assamualaikum ♥

This entry will be short & precise…promise.

First and foremost, thank you…thank you and thank you so much to those who drop me notes and emails giving support, courage and appreciation words. I am quite surprised to receive a lot of emails, encourage and support me to write more especially on my PhD journey. I am trying my best to update on this but I would like to make a sincere apologize first if I am down with idea and mood….and to those who has send me inquiry especially on the PhD journey and experience living abroad…I hope I have replied each of them and please note me if there is any that I have miss out…sorry I could not fulfill some of the inquiry by asking me to answer through a post in my blog. Currently I am quite tight with my schedule. I will reply immediately to your email for all the inquiries drop to my email. I might not be the most eligible person to share the experiences, but hope stand in as a second year PhD student and almost 5 years living abroad will help a bit if not a lot.

Reading the title…yes I am in a hard and stress stage at the moment …stage of collecting data, a lot of paper to be written for the conferences…chapters to be submitted…I am not really a type of person to share my sad & stress feeling to others except those who close to me…back during my Master and early PhD study, kak syiqin used to be the person who will I refer to..she has witnessed my tears,laughter and worried moment. Now, she already return to Malaysia for good after completing her PhD study…looking forward for her appearance in Dundee back this June for her convocation…a lot of stories to share!!!

Ok done..promise to be short and precise…back to writing mode.
Take care!!!

♥Farah♥

 

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My loves….supporters that always by my side…